Ok Im going to ask this one more time b/c people misunderstood. I asked a question yesterday aboutchildsupport

MY QUESTION........


My daughter's father and I moved to Fl. from NJ about 4 yrs ago. Well right after I had my daughter (about 2 1/2yrs ago) we split up. Well since then he has had 2 more children and moved back to NJ. He would send $50 on month and $100 the next month and nothing the next.. I could not depend on his support so I filed for child support. Now he is requesting a paternity test and wants to come all the way to FL for the hearing (when it can be done via phone). I believe he is just trying to prolong the process. Im not worried about the paternity part because he signed the birth certificate so child support will not pay for that and neither will he. Now he says he is not sending anything to help take care of his child until the order is final because child support will not record what he sent. So now Im struggling to provide for my daughter on my own. The child support process is time consuming!! What can or should I do? Please give me some suggestions!!

Ok Im going to ask this one more time b/c people misunderstood. I asked a question yesterday aboutchildsupport
Whoever wrote that obviously has no idea how expensive it is to raise a child. Child support usually doesn't pay for a whole lot, so to say a woman is "living off" of child support is hilarious. It is simply not possible to live off of the little bit of support a single mother gets. Men who don't care for their children are "deadbeats, @ssholes, and losers", to put it kindly. Call your child support worker every day. EVERY day. They will get sick of hearing from you and work your case faster. Tell them what you are going through, let them know how you are struggling. It's tough, I know. I have raised my daughter for the past 8 years with zero child support. It makes me so angry when men resent the money they have to pay in support, which, in most cases, barely covers daycare. They owe their child that money, it has nothing to do with liking the child's mother. This goes for women who are ordered to pay support, too.
Reply:W/O kids you still have to support you. CS is for their needs not yours. We pay $1000 for 2 and moved so we could afford to live. Now drive 250 mi to visit, gas over $3 gal motels $60. The beyatch still wants more. Report It

Reply:Ignore what those people said it was probably written by a deadbeat/ a*shole. I know what you mean about child support taking forever. I've been trying to get my daughters father to start paying it and the courts take FOREVER.





My response to the people who wrote that crap you said she laid down and had the child she should take care of it...well she didn't do it alone. Why should she take care of the child alone? It takes two to make a baby therefore it should take two to support the child. i don't give a f*ck how many other kids he has. He needs to either take responsibility for all or stop getting people pregnant.
Reply:I don't know what to say about your question but that idiot who left you that comment deserves to be sterlized lest he has children and doesn't care for them or pay for them.





It takes two to lie down and make a baby and it takes that to take care of them. What a sick moron.
Reply:Sounds like a major jerk. He'll probably eventually do the same thing to the other 2 kids. In the meantime, hang in there. Do the best with what you have, and keep fighting. Eventually, if the paternity test proves he's the father, he'll be ordered to pay child support (hopefully including back payments). If he still doesn't pay, look into garnishing his wages. This is where his employer is ordered by the Court to pay part of his paycheck directly to you. Of course, if he changes jobs, you'd have to follow him from job to job to keep up the wage garnishment. Good luck. Your daughter is lucky to have you. I know it's hard.
Reply:My first reaction would be to say it was probably a man who wrote that answer, but there are women who would say the same thing. I saw a case on Dr Phil one time last year, where a man was trying to get a court to say that he could sign his rights away to a child that was a result of a one night stand, and that he would have no financial responsibility for this child, as he wanted nothing at all to do with it. This is why I think that anyone, married or single, needs to really stop and think of the consequences of sex BEFORE they have it. The only completely fool-proof method of preventing a pregnancy is abstinence or complete hysterectomy. Even birth control or surgical procedures are not fool-proof. There are even documented cases of women who have no uterus, having abnominal pregnancies. Therefore, if someone, be it man or woman, is not prepared to care for a child, they need to not have sex. Just because he decided later on that he didn't want this child, doesn't get him out of a moral and financial obligation to his child. Even if he doesn't pay anything now, trust me, the court can back date his child support. A child deserves child support. It is not good enough for a woman to simply do what she has to in order to support her child. The child deserves to have everything they need and not go without.





Give it time. Truth will prevail.





BTW: Go back and read the last question this person who you are speaking of asked 4 weeks ago, way before you asked your initial question. She has issues with women getting child support. It wasn't about you, it is just because she is a jerk. The majority of us are not that ignorant about child support and a parents responsibility.
Reply:First off he is correct any money he sends you that does not go through the court will not be counted as child support, sorry. Secondly he does not have to be present in Flordia for the child support hearing and since he signed the birth certificate it will be a cold day in most judges chambers before the even grant him permission to seek a DNA test. My oldest nephew signed papers she mentioned to someone it wasnt his kid he wanted a DNA done which she agreed to until the time came then refused it. He took her to court the court denied it since he signed the papers and the only way to get a DNA was to petition the state supreme court which costs 15000 up front which obviously he's not going to do. You need to provide a copy of the paternity papers to whoever you filed child support with if you filed with the states attorny general they will handle everything on your behalf. Furthermore and I dont often suggest this to anyone there is assistance out there for ppl that need help foodstamps, aid for families with dependant children, medical assistance swallow your pride and get it.. For your childs sake
Reply:you should have been happy with what was going on. no offense but you need to support yourself. child support and alimony only works if the guy is NOT A DEAD BET! from the sound of it this guy is a loser, I'm surprised you expected anything out of him.
Reply:The person who wrote that has issues, a man is just as responsible in the creation of life as the female. Grant it many girls have sex with multiple partners so paternity is not always known. Having said that if this loser wants nothing to do with this child that is his loss but to not take responsibility for a life he helped create and signed a BC for is beyond me. How does he sleep at night. He needs a reality check. Hit him with child support and if he wants to contest it but in many states if his name is on the birth certificate he is the father and therefore must pay for that child and I would force the issue.
Reply:typical answer problably from a man..


honey it does take time. ull have to wait it out.. dont worry hell have to backpay. they can take money from his checks if he doesnt send them on his own, and theyll even take property
Reply:First off, I am sorry for whoever wrote that. They apparently have never been in that situation. Now, if he signed the birth certificate, and it is his child... he is going to have to be reasp. for all the "payments" he didn't make. Another side note, you may qualify for cash assistance from the sate you work in, but then you will not get child support payments once he starts paying again.


I would make an appt. with the people down at the F.O.C. and see what they can do to help you and your child out.

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